FLTC I am suprised the Major was given leave. Since your tour is longer than mine I definitely am not passing any judgement. If I went home on my tour it would not made any difference. I kept my head in the game but it was a struggle. I surely hope he saves his marriage.
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Once we get married, as men, we sometimes forget about making our wives feel special, and just search for that next promotion, that next degree....and we forget that our spouse is a "life mate". I'll never make that mistake again.
Absolutely. One of the reasons I have not entered into a relationship is what you say takes considerable effort I am not willing to give and will not raise anyones expectations.
I read in a book (still doing the discovery thing) each area of our consious is segmented in rooms. In every room in a woman's head all decisions are filtered through relationships and validation and it's directed toward the person they are or wish to connect with. (husband, dad, friend, kids, ect. ) Hense they are always consious of these relationships and working in one direction or another along with their other tasks (work, logistics, and so on)
Men on the other hand have a specific room for relationships thus can must manually switch to that room prior to connecting with the other person. Otherwise we are working on cars, weapons, politics, jobs and so on. (Love October since all the Major sports are playing)
This is why when our partners will bring up a subject that troubles them we go into fix it mode instead of just listening and validating. Our wiring prevents us to make this jump easily and it is a learned art reguardless if it's our Mothers, daughters, sisters, wives, girlfriends, or female buddies or coworkers.
Though we may intellectually know this can we internalize and make that path to the relationship room easily? I found even after researching and some attempts it is not. One cause for me is my goals are simply to hang out not a deep committed relationship. However I believe if I enter into one I would probably let the path to the relationship room grow weeds and become more work to get there out of lazyness and a bit of selfishness. At this time it is a consious choice. When I was married I just denied the reality and was eaten by the phrase "I'll work on it tomorrow" thus when tomorrow came I reaped that harvest. I hope you do not.
Currently There are too many things I would like to do while I still am still physically able thus that path to the relationship room is not currently maintained well. Surfs up today on the coast.
May your soldiers netrualize all bad guys and deliver the goods with 0 friendly casualities. No purple hearts.
"All I want is a weeks pay for a day's work" Steve Martin
