The role of the OP in MLC

[Valentine]

...read up on narcissitic personality disorder - I think you will see a lot of traits your h exhibits [I am not saying all MLCers have borderline narcissitc personality disorder] NPDers have a need for adulation that goes beyond what is normal. I always remember praising something my h had done - about ten years ago, and i said, 'I am not going over the top on this am I?'

and he replied'You should know by now that I can never have enough praise' He said it lightly, with a laugh, but I thnk there was a lot of truth in it. His parents never gave him much praise. If he got all As, and one A minus, they would want to knw why he had got an A minus!! He won prizes, scholarships, awards but they were dismissive. 'Didn't want him to get a swollen head' was how they put i. Well, our second son is very bright, and I do know how dangerous it can be to make a kid feel valued only for what they can do, or to make them feel 'better' than other people' But you can do it in a way that bolsters their self esteem.

I feel sorry for the parenting my h had.

A, I think my H suffers from this....oodles of praise from mommy dearest---the sun rose and set on him----and NONE from his dad. His dad did not even attend his HS graduation.

He needs an exorbitant amount of praise...he recently painted the garage floor and asked me about 5X "how did it look"...each time I told him "great, looks marvelous!"...and I meant it...but Criminy, how many times do i have to say it??? He doesn't compliment me about hardly anything. I don't need to be complimented as much though. I know if I did good, if I look okay, if the house is immaculate...just knowing it in MY MIND is many times, enough for me.

Geez, he is narcissistic.

I think Cinder's H and ACLL are very similar. They are both very unlikable people right now.