Just got home from work, DD is staying with my parents for the weekend, so I am all alone in the house.
W left today (Fri) to go on her romantic getaway with OM, and won't be back until Mon night.
She left me a nice note to remind me to keep the house tidy, mop the floors and clean "my" bathroom. First time she has asked me to clean my bathroom as she does the bathrooms whilst I vacuum and mop both levels. I think it may be another way of turning the screws abit as I have not instigated any communications with her for several weeks, and she is doing all the calling. I suppose it is a way to try and push my buttons, but to no effect.
Also, she told me two days ago that she had a new mobile number, and I told her to just txt it to me whenever.......well I am still waiting for it. But I didn't call her old mobile for several weeks so I am not in a hurry to get it.
My moods change from time to time in relation to what I want out of life. Some days I want my W back and want my family to be together again, but then I think about other peoples sitches in piecing, and think whether I want to live like that again.
I am sort of happier with my freedom now, and when I look back on my life with W, she has failed in so many areas (that I did not see at the time). I think to myself was there a "reason" for me being away so often, and for the intimacy to have died? Maybe I was feeling the same way as she was, and she had the courage to nip it in the bud and walk........who knows.
I just find it so unfair that I stuck by her through everything, and she was so fickle to jump ship when things got tough for her.
DD is sleeping at my parents Tonight and Sat night, then I pick her up on Sunday evening (W is out of town and I have early starts over the next few days), have Mon and Tue off, work Wed, then back to Canberra on Thu through to the following Tue.
Went and saw a movie and dinner with friends after work tonight. Will be going out for drinks tomorrow (Sat) night after work. Then probably sleep at my parents with DD on Sun night. I slept there on Thu night with DD and it brought back memories. My room is very similar to when I lived at home over 20 years ago. Got about 1 hours sleep as the weirdness kept me awake all night
I can't imagine sleeping at my parents. Luckily they have both moved from the houses they lived in when I was a child. Now tho' they live next to one another. Wierd eh? Saffie
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
Your doing good. I am glad to hear that you are able to spend so much time with your DD. She is truly a blessing. Keep focusing on your DD and yourself.
I think the mood swings are part of the process. I to go from looking forward to life on my own to struggling with the emotions of wanting to keep my family whole. Part of the heeling process???
Well, I am typing this just before the England, Australia match. We don't know who to support because as I told you before H has Australia in his sweepstake at work. I guess for us here it is a win win scenario!!!!
I shall think of you whilst watching the match!!!!
Saffie
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
