SDFGirl, I hope the therapist didn't let your H get away with the work excuse. You deserve connection in your M.
What kind of work does he do? Is he spending too much time there? How does he make a connection between work and his failure to connect in the M? CL
Hi CL--
No, she definitely didn't let him get away with anything on that front. She asked him if he saw how his job was affecting not just him, but me and the R. H does have a bit of a problem focusing on more than one thing at a time, but I guess I think that should be our R.
He works for a nonprofit which means long hours and way too much work. It's their super busy season, so H comes home and just wants to turn off. I totally understand that and support it...to a point. Take an hour or so to yourself to mess around and do something to help you wind down. I do that myself, and I think it's really healthy. However, at some point you have to set work aside and put your attention on what's important, on what could, potentially, be a really positive thing.
He's just not getting it that if he's not filling my love tank, I am shutting down physically and emotionally. Do I want that? No. But it's happening all the same.
We'll see what happens. I hope he does what he needs to do before I am just plain done.
SD
Me: 40 H: 43 H had EA from 2/06-9/06 Bomb 5/06 Piecing since 9/2006 3/2008: Boundary setting 7/2009: Boundary crossing~dropped my own bomb. 8/2010: Marriage finally on track!
