Thanks for the remider NDDT! Just a quick note: I noticed that you have changed a lot lately and it seems consistent, your attitude is amazing, I am just admiring the way you started to rise from your hole. Keep on moving forward, it's good to see you taking control of your life.
Hey its been alot of 2 (1 1/2?) steps forward 1 back type of thing, but that extra 1 (1/2?) steps add up after awhile and a person gains momentum. A big jump forward occurred when I threw my hands in the air and exclaimed, "I give up, what will be will be!!) Since that point, I am just doing the best for me.... Sometimes it is hard work, sometimes it is painful work. But it is work that has to be done.....I really dont feel as if I have arrived anywhere yet. I feel like I am just starting down this road. But I know that there are rewards at the end........
I am also aware that the hardest work still lays ahead!! That most likely the worst.....(most painful) parts lie ahead. I am work at preparing myself at possible outcomes. I see good things if I do not lay down and stop working...
And if you really think about it......anything is possible! With lots of hard work, I could take my neglected body to the best shape I have ever been in in my life.
With alot of hard work, and the willingness to take chances, I could more financially successful than I have ever been!
Hell maybe I could the next Mr Brittany Spears!!! She looks like a gal that needs a friend these days. I bet a sypathetic ear would go along way......
I maybe could not be president, I would need some serious good spin doctors to uhhhhh explain a few facts of my past........
But let me tell you all something!!!! WHAT YOU DO WITH YOU LIFE IS UP TO YOU!!! It is you that holds you back, it is you that propels you forward. You know what all this [censored] is??? ITS about taking responsibilty for you. Admit where you Effed Up in the past. Seek forgiveness, then let go. Bigger yet forgive yourself.
Nothing left but to either move forward.....cuz I sure dont plan on dying soon. And I dont plan to live my life in a rut, ie....my life sucks because .........she left me.........my boss in a #$@!wad......I owe so much to this bank and this bank....and it could on an on......
A positive attitude can help fix alot of ones problems. And to also know which things cant be fixed. Just accept them for what they are. It is what it is.
They easy part is to look at all this. To make these big dreams/plans. To see the possible outcomes. That is the easy part.....
The hard part is the day by day grind of it all. To see all the little daily steps one has to get to where they want to go. To make a big plan, then break the Effer down, to shorter and shorter term goals. Till you get to the point, where you got your daily, geez sometimes even hourly goals.......
sidebar....next week I am going to an oral surgeon, I am gonna have 2 teeth ripped out of my head. I have been ignoring this pain hoping it would go away for way to long now. I have been eating acetaminiphane and ibuprohren like candy for the last couple of months. I probably have been drinking more than I should to just to dull it. Also probably about 2 - 3 tubes of oragel a week.
Now to a sometimes slow wit like myself it took me to this point to even admit to myself that perhaps I got a friggen problem here. Well this is what I mean about gettin up off of ones dead azz and dealing with things that........hey......DUH G..... perhaps there mister slowwit, perhaps maybe you ought to do something about this??? So yeah, hey thats a good thought....So I do the logical thing.....I ponder it for 2 weeks!!!
Tuesday, I made the appointment. Next week thursday, I see the oral surgeon. Now here is an example of breaking down goals, for this for me it will be minute by minute. For a big guy as I am, I fear dentists...the pain.
But look at all the long term outcome. I could live with alot less pain!!! I wont blow my liver with all them pain killers. Long term reward. Short term rewards are there too, I kinda like when they gas me, (I always fall in love with the assistant!! happens everytime.........so glad they put that bib on me, kinda hides ........uh well things!!) Also my dentist is pretty generous with the GOOD pain pills. I took a days vacation next friday.....plan to just sort of haze through that day!!
Anyways.........I have seriously digressed here, uh where was I? (looks back up)
Ok breaking down goals, daily grind and all.
Guess what I am trying to say. Make a plan. Break it down. Refine it. Then breaking it down to a daily level. Live each day best you can. Try to do something each day to work towards your goals. Moneys tight? quit buy lunch at work, bring your own for a fraction of what you pay. Do something to improve the quality of your life. Cant quit smoking yet? Have 2 less before work in the morning. All this small stuff adds up!!
Also try to do something to improve the quality of someone elses life. This can sooner or later payback in HUGE rewards!! Think of them guys that found that bum in the desert way back when, and it turned out to be Howard Hughes!! That A-hole at work you cant stand.....say something nice to them. Might stop them from being an A-hole for a little while at least!!! Smile at the grumpy clerk.
Wow, I have ranted on like a madman for quite awhile now. I dont know if anyone out there will really get what I am saying. I hope so. But if you dont, aint gonna kill me.
Wow. Well after that nice long post last night, about goals and problems and such.
I get hit with a big one. She filed. I guess its all over but the cryin now. Had to hit me when my eyes are all blurry from the eye drops at vision test too.
Worst part is that she stole my lawyer....... I talked to last July, guess I should have retained him. Not good, definatly has a jump on me now. As they also have my version of things...I might be screwed.
I am not suprised, but I am hurt and angry at the moment. Drops kid off, gives me a financial disclosure statement, and sez "Have a nice weekend"
I asked why she has filed, and she said, (this is classic), "Well this living apart is not working for me"
I am definatly at this point going to fight now. Going to fight for my rights as a father, and to keep this house........
If that L consulted with you, and got confidential info, he'd be conflicted out and barred from being adverse to you, whether you hired him or not (regardless of a retainer). Check into that with your L.
Nomo
M 39 W 39 M'd 10 yrs; T 14 yrs S7 D4 Bomb 5-8-05 W not working on M 1-22-07; EA 2-22 DB 4-10 S 6-11 No more C Link
Not only do I think that there could be some legal ramifications for the situation with your wife & lawyer like Nomo said - I think it is really insane for your W to hire the one that you went to. Does she know he is who you went to? Is there like only 1 in your town or something?
There are more than 1 lawyer in town. She did not know that I had talked to this lawyer. But he did take confidential information from me. I just called the firm and talked to the secretary.
Wife actually talked to a different lawyer in the same office. But there is a conflict of interest there. So now neither of us will most likely be able to use that firm, unless one of us does sign a waiver. I surely will not. So she is going to have to get a different lawyer now.....
Guess that will not make her happy.
aww man.......I dont want to deal with all of this....
Note to self, go back and read post I made last night over and over!
Well, ok here it is about 6 hours post MAJOR bomb drop. And you know what? I am ok. I went out and had a nice dinner with my kid. We played for a bit. I talked to a friend on the phone.
In away I am actually a bit surpised at myself for not being more wigged out right now.? But I am pretty much ok.
I think I am going to get a p/o'ed phone call next week from her. She is not going to be happy when she gets that call from "her" lawyer and he tells her that he cannot represent her. They now cant represent me either. I have an appointment Monday am with a different attorney. I am wondering if her attorney drops her, if that stops the legal action? I am going to inquire about that. She definatly has made her intentions clear. Perhaps, I can get the first punch in now?
Funny thought I had.......I figure about by 11 am on Monday she will know.... I was thinking that I should go to as many intial consults as I can early Monday, so every lawyer she calls, she gets, "Sorry we cannot represent you!!" LOL
But seriously folks.....this is all about me now. I will use the techniques I have learned here to improve my life. I plan on building for myself and my daughter a better life than I ever had.
The little bit of hope I had left was killed today. Today, I took my ring off. It is done. And I am ok.
