My situation is all about extremes, going from one extreme to another. I am encouraged by the fact that the papers have not been filed. However, not overly encouraged. My plan is to lay low for awhile and occasionally text her or not text her at all. No set schedule for sending txt msgs other than not doing it too often. Perhaps I will let her send me a txt. She has done so in the past. I have read up on creating attraction. While most of these books are geared towards single guys trying to pick up women, there are however, many useful concepts that guys in our particular situations can apply and some even overlap with DB'ing. The main one is being unpredictable (within reason) and being unavailable (called "giving her the gift of missing you" an interesting analogy is that diamonds are valued b/c they are scarce, if diamonds were everywhere, they would not be so valuable.)
I have found in my situation that time and space tends to soothe hostile emotions. I may go a few weeks without any contact and then send her a txt msg joke and then stop. I gauge her response for the next time I initiate contact or respond to her txt or phone call. Being positive and confident when interacting with my W is sometimes tough but if I were to come across as angry or needy, I could kiss any chance of reconciliation good-bye. She did not fall in love with an angry or needy guy. I am under no illusions that my strategy will be successful, but at least the papers aren't filed as of yet, and that is a positive.
As someone once said, "a woman will say what she thinks but act how she feels."
Thanks for the comments and / or suggestions. They are a great help in times like this. To be continued....
