Hey its been alot of 2 (1 1/2?) steps forward 1 back type of thing, but that extra 1 (1/2?) steps add up after awhile and a person gains momentum. A big jump forward occurred when I threw my hands in the air and exclaimed, "I give up, what will be will be!!) Since that point, I am just doing the best for me.... Sometimes it is hard work, sometimes it is painful work. But it is work that has to be done.....I really dont feel as if I have arrived anywhere yet. I feel like I am just starting down this road. But I know that there are rewards at the end........
I am also aware that the hardest work still lays ahead!! That most likely the worst.....(most painful) parts lie ahead. I am work at preparing myself at possible outcomes. I see good things if I do not lay down and stop working...
And if you really think about it......anything is possible! With lots of hard work, I could take my neglected body to the best shape I have ever been in in my life.
With alot of hard work, and the willingness to take chances, I could more financially successful than I have ever been!
Hell maybe I could the next Mr Brittany Spears!!! She looks like a gal that needs a friend these days. I bet a sypathetic ear would go along way......
I maybe could not be president, I would need some serious good spin doctors to uhhhhh explain a few facts of my past........
But let me tell you all something!!!! WHAT YOU DO WITH YOU LIFE IS UP TO YOU!!! It is you that holds you back, it is you that propels you forward. You know what all this [censored] is??? ITS about taking responsibilty for you. Admit where you Effed Up in the past. Seek forgiveness, then let go. Bigger yet forgive yourself.
Nothing left but to either move forward.....cuz I sure dont plan on dying soon. And I dont plan to live my life in a rut, ie....my life sucks because .........she left me.........my boss in a #$@!wad......I owe so much to this bank and this bank....and it could on an on......
A positive attitude can help fix alot of ones problems. And to also know which things cant be fixed. Just accept them for what they are. It is what it is.
They easy part is to look at all this. To make these big dreams/plans. To see the possible outcomes. That is the easy part.....
The hard part is the day by day grind of it all. To see all the little daily steps one has to get to where they want to go. To make a big plan, then break the Effer down, to shorter and shorter term goals. Till you get to the point, where you got your daily, geez sometimes even hourly goals.......
sidebar....next week I am going to an oral surgeon, I am gonna have 2 teeth ripped out of my head. I have been ignoring this pain hoping it would go away for way to long now. I have been eating acetaminiphane and ibuprohren like candy for the last couple of months. I probably have been drinking more than I should to just to dull it. Also probably about 2 - 3 tubes of oragel a week.
Now to a sometimes slow wit like myself it took me to this point to even admit to myself that perhaps I got a friggen problem here. Well this is what I mean about gettin up off of ones dead azz and dealing with things that........hey......DUH G..... perhaps there mister slowwit, perhaps maybe you ought to do something about this??? So yeah, hey thats a good thought....So I do the logical thing.....I ponder it for 2 weeks!!!
Tuesday, I made the appointment. Next week thursday, I see the oral surgeon. Now here is an example of breaking down goals, for this for me it will be minute by minute. For a big guy as I am, I fear dentists...the pain.
But look at all the long term outcome. I could live with alot less pain!!! I wont blow my liver with all them pain killers. Long term reward. Short term rewards are there too, I kinda like when they gas me, (I always fall in love with the assistant!! happens everytime.........so glad they put that bib on me, kinda hides ........uh well things!!) Also my dentist is pretty generous with the GOOD pain pills. I took a days vacation next friday.....plan to just sort of haze through that day!!
Anyways.........I have seriously digressed here, uh where was I? (looks back up)
Ok breaking down goals, daily grind and all.
Guess what I am trying to say. Make a plan. Break it down. Refine it. Then breaking it down to a daily level. Live each day best you can. Try to do something each day to work towards your goals. Moneys tight? quit buy lunch at work, bring your own for a fraction of what you pay. Do something to improve the quality of your life. Cant quit smoking yet? Have 2 less before work in the morning. All this small stuff adds up!!
Also try to do something to improve the quality of someone elses life. This can sooner or later payback in HUGE rewards!! Think of them guys that found that bum in the desert way back when, and it turned out to be Howard Hughes!! That A-hole at work you cant stand.....say something nice to them. Might stop them from being an A-hole for a little while at least!!! Smile at the grumpy clerk.
Wow, I have ranted on like a madman for quite awhile now. I dont know if anyone out there will really get what I am saying. I hope so. But if you dont, aint gonna kill me.
