Thanks, JMC, and thanks to you too, Save. God's Army is multiplying....
I guess I am at a point now where the more I stay away from W, the better I do. I feel she is in semi MLC, if there is such a thing. She for years, played the mom and housekeeper role and now she decides to shed her skin and become her former independent self with kids.
Don't get me wrong, she is still a good mother, and its not like she has abandoned her roles there. But she has went and had body piercings done, sees OM late at night when kids go to sleep, and thinks shes happier now then she has been in a long time.
If she is happier, more power to her. I just worry and have this strange feeling, (could it be God talking to me?) that her wonderful R with OM is going to crash down and then she what happens. I know I sound vengeful, and maybe a small part of me is, but I can't help feel this will come full circle some day....million dollar question is...Will I be here for her?
I must admit though, I feel stronger then ever. Probably knowing that I am not ready for a R, I don't have to deal with the bullsh*t that comes with it. I know Rs have those and we overlook them, but I landed a job making a lot more money than I ever dreamed of, and I am not ready to have an OW in my life right now..and the kids are starting to migrate to my side in this....which I welcome them with open arms. A lot more than I used to. Since last year when we split, I have become the father I should have been many moons ago. I praise God for that eye opener.
Sorry to ramble, I feel the same in that I feel we will be together again someday...but the plans don't unfold at once but over time, and every so often I get another piece of the plan and I implement it and get stronger because of it.
If I don't get my W back, I wish her the best...but I know its her loss, and I will make the next woman very happy knowing what I know now.
Thanks for reading guys..and girls..its people like you that make this BB a blessing to vent on.
