That was what I seem to have remembered. What happened as far as his interactions with you after your support? Did it bring him closer, do nothing, or push him more away?
the next day he fell apart again, and I did what my friend and therapist both recommended. which was listen, but let him have his pain, not try to fix it myself. I asked him (exactly how they told me to) if it would help talking to an IC again. he just left his, but never really did anything with it...spent his sessions bitching about me I think, did no work, had a bad fit for a therapist on top of it. so he hasn't had the same therapy I have had, to say the least. anyway, he said no, he didn't want to talk to anyone, that he'd done therapy and it was a waste of time. I let that be...he has to want it on his own. I told him if he changed his mind, i'd be happy to help him find someone new. I told him to take care of himself.
and that was that. he went away to vegas, came back with a different mindset...a weekend away with your ow will do that I suppose. he got a bit pissy/annoying with me last week about me not telling him everything about my private life, and re-set the original bounderies of not talking about social lives and such, that I needed that to try to detach from him, etc, etc.
these breakdowns do not bring him closer to me, I'm discovering. but at least the time I'm talking about here was better, because I didn't try to fix things for him. and now, I'm stepping back even further. who knows, maybe tomorrow when I see him I'll ask how he is doing. we shall see. like I said, I'll talk to my friend.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
