thanks, donna. my not approaching him/trying to make it better/even just to listen/nurture is a huge 180. I don't know what is right or wrong, just going with my gut tonight...as much as my heart wanted to open my arms and let him pour his heart out.
it did help that he didn't look quite so depressed when I got home tonight. the kids were in bed, and he was out on the porch smoking. he took up smoking (which I can't stand) when he started the affair with ow, btw. anyway, I don't know for sure that he would have poured his heart out by this time. likely he would have, but maybe not. and for all I know its not for the reasons I think it is (missing the kids, feeling messed up, etc). it could just be that he was hungover from too much beer at the sox game, not enough sleep from being out/up late, missing ow because he's been over here so many nights this week, and having to face the weekend without her.
again, I'm not going to speculate (although I suppose I just did, lol).
I love him. he knows I do. hell, I just told him so 2 weeks ago during his breakdown then. he knows I am here for him and will help him if he wants me to. the problem is he has to want me to, and he can't quite accept that he does want me to, or else he really doesn't want me to.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
