If I went with your plan then I could have sex on vacation 2 or 3 times/year, in exactly one position with oral only if I force myself upon him. [...] That appears to be what he is "comfortable with".
ok, maybe poor/incomplete wording on my part.
there's slight differences between "willing", "comfortable", and "too far"/"too much".
What I meant, was trying to determine what is "too far, or too much", and staying below that.
At the same time, though, keep trying to make him more comfortable with the whole experience as well.
Consider this:
If giving HIM oral, every time... meant that he suddenly became an interested and willing partner with you.. even though you never received it.... would you do that?
I'm not saying that is definately the way to go. I'm just using that as an example of thinking creatively about it. With a "beginners mind", an all that.. throwing past resentment about it out the window, as it were.
To put it another way... If you were to accept that he simply does not like giving oral sex, and resigned yourself to never having it again, but having your needs met in some other ways that he felt more comfortable with... would that change your perspectives and attitudes on your willingness to give HIM oral?
My current status: june 2006. Wife ran out and filed D. Finalized Jan 11, 2010, after 12.5 years M. 3 wonderful sons caught in the middle
