One thing that ROOT failed to mention. You need to STOP PURSUING.
The email exchange above is a pursuit. "It's just difficult not knowing where I fit into the big picture." Wrong, wrong, wrong. You need to not care where you fit in the big picture. Because.... YOU will decide what the big picture looks like and where you fit in. Hey, it is not up to her!!
Detach and get on with your life. The more you pursue, the more she will run away.
