What I know....

[myturnnow]

Hi Angelica,

I used to think I was in control, but lately, I don't know. My patience is wearing very thin as the Rat and XH are really, really provoking me and using the kids to do so.

I sent XH an email with the kids schedules, open house dates, basketball games, etc. I needed to know what dates we were exchanging as he is going away during his weekend next week.

I got zero response to those questions but got another email addressing the passports and the trip he wants to take to the Dominican.

I thought it was funny how detailed the email was and how none of my questions regarding visitation were answered.

XH called tonight to talk to my D which he NEVER does..He is seeing her tomorrow, anyway.

So, I thought he was calling to talk to me about the email as I said I would be happy to discuss his email to me regarding the trip tomorrow.

He says what email??

The bi**ch won't even let me correspond via email to XH. She checks his cell phone, emails, texts, etc.

I lost it.

I know, the worst thing I can do.

I said to him I CANNOT FIGURE OUT FOR THE LIFE OF ME WHY THE HELL SHE IS IN THE MIDDLE OF ALL THIS?? WHY IS SHE EVEN INVOLVED? THE CHILDREN ARE NONE OR HER CONCERN AS I DONT GET INVOLVED WITH HER R WITH HER XH. I TOLD XH SHE IS PROMOTING OUR FIGHTING WHICH IS NOT HEALTHY FOR THE KIDS AND YOU ARE ALLOWING HER TO DO SO.

I said to him I didn't know him anymore. I told him how wonderful he was to the kids over the summer. I told him how much I enjoyed getting along with him and how I hate fighting. I said to him I didn't understand why he was constantly trying to start fights. I said to him the reason I don't want the kids leaving the country with you is that your R with the RAt is so unstable that I don't want to have to travle out of the country to get the kids when the two of you lose it. I said you make poor decisions about the kids welfare when the two of you are together and that she encourages it because XH acts like a completely different person when he is alone with them. (and he does, I am not kidding..I know you can't blame the chick with all of this but it is freakin nuts to see how much different he acts when she is around. It's like he is possessed..not kidding)

I said to him we are here for you. No matter what. I will always listen to your concern about the kids and the problems you may have with the D. But I will not listen to anymore of the dysfunction of your R with the Rat nor will I be the target of it anymore. I said the only thing you two have in common right now is your hatred towards me.

I told him not to call anymore and keep the contact via email.

Ironically, it will probably be from her.

I know I shouldn't have even responded. But this is about my freakin kids LEAVING THE COUNTRY..

XH was so pissed that I am not convinced that the kids leaving the country with him is a good idea that he is spitting nails. Kept saying to me..don't you trust me? I said based on history, no I don't.

He was LIVID. He said the judge will think I am insane as to not want the kids to have fun with their dad.

I said I encourage any type of time with the kids when you are not acting erratic and irrational. At the moment, you are doing both.

I told him he needs to give me details about any trip he takes with the kids. He said he doesn't have to and even if he did that to get me to give him passports he could lie. He said to me he could bring them to Russia if he wants.

That was the last straw.

He is f-ing nuts..NPD..or whatever..I am only human and I cannot be bullied and bullied and not respond.

This OW is unbelieveable.

How the hell do I put her in her place?

I am DYING to do that..

Four years of her involved in my sh**..She drives my car..She buys clothes that look like mine..she prods the kids for info about me...Then she f-ing changes her bathing suit and is NAKED in front of my d10 and 13 YEAR OLD SON!

ARGH!!!!

[Jeanette1120]

Sounds like someone is quite jelous of you. It also sounds like someone is being a nasty nagging bitch to your h...oops, i mean x husband. Ha! Don't worry honey....you do not have to get back at her......she's getting back at herself. She is slowly putting herself into her own place...and taking your x...down into the pits of hell with her.

Just document everything

Don't be bluffed by thier tactics.....I mean...they are totally acting moronic to say the least????

Just keep your cool......let them play out the soap opera they have developed. Be happy knowing that SHE is JELOUS of YOU. Ha! Take that!

Don't forget that "what you know" is priceless.

Jeanette

[almosthopeful]

(((mtn))),

I'm feeling pretty reactive now, so this may not be the best response you get...but, is it time to get your L involved? Maybe have your L send him a cautionary letter. Documenting that you are unable to even communicate with him directly because she controls emails, documenting that he threatened to take the children to Russia (who cares if he means it, he said it); documenting your rights to know the children's whereabouts, word-for-word, from your separation agreement?

For me, it would be worth the hour or two of L fees just to hand it over to my L and say send this a** and the a**ette a letter.

OTOH, I'm pretty ticked myself tonight, so let's see what others think.

Hugs, regardless,
AH

[goal]

I absolutely hate your H's OW, what a skank.

The best revenge remember is SUCCESS.

Look good, act happy (not mad) but do protect your children.
That is were the line is drawn, the kids.

I agree with Jeannette, she is jealous. She can't even be herself.

[myturnnow]

Hi Guys,

Boy, did I need to read your posts so thank you. I started to feel like I was going out of my mind thinking I was making too big a deal out if.

So, I sent XH an email. Drew the line with emails being read. Told him what I thought about OW. Said obviously her intenetions towards me are not in good faith nor the kids.

I said to him she encourages you to trash me so she can feel good about herself. That perpetual cycle is dangerous for the kids.

And, I told him she was psychtotic and to keep her away from the kids as she feel entitled to violate his privacy, my privacy and the kids.

This was the clincher..

XH brought her kid here this weekend. XH sent him to the door to knock and get our kids for the night.

OW's 5 year old son came to the door I let him in.

I gave him a hug. He is only a kid and it's not his fault his mom is a skank.

Anyway, sent this to Xh..

"When Ow's S came to the my door this weekend I gave him a hug.

When OW was around our D she called me a f-ing bit**

See the difference"

The response I got form him.

"Put your name in the place where you put OW and you would be accurate..you are the drama queen..
1. Do not give me your opinions anymore
2. Never say the OW's name
3 Go f**k yourself.

Nice, huh?

So I sent back I am sorry you feel that way.

My L is going to get a copy of the harrassment and how it is impossible to correspond with him via email. Actually, I think XH likes it that she is in the middle as he sees a catfight and thrives on it. Also, it gives him an excuse to talk to me about the kids in person as OW is a snoop.

Whatever..

I am pulling myself out of the equation and I am done with him playing the "kid" card for a reaction..

I am going to fax my L a letter about his threats, OW's behavior and my desire to not have the kids around all this dysfunction..

Okay, time for me to go to sleep..

Geez, this was a sucky month..I thought XH was supposed to go away and stop bugging me now that he has his D.

Well, maybe it gets to him that
I got the house
I went back to school
Got my grad degree
Have the greatest new boyfriend in the world the kids love
The new boyfriend is even nice to XH (he must HATE that)
And I got a job as a college professor..

What a stoop..

He must feel sick to his stomach each time he gets the kids and sees how alive the house is again..

I wish we could all just freakin get along..

It is so much easier..

But is it bad to say I hope that the RAt chokes on her fishbone tonight..

***sorry for all of the typos..I am cross-eyed tired and embarrassed to say I teach English..lol

nighty night

[almosthopeful]

Ooohhh, I hadn't even thought about him liking the idea of the two of you fighting...that is nauseating. Sorry, but it is.

Good moves mtn, you are holding up well and staying sane.

Hugs.
AH

[myturnnow]

A.H.

Thanks..

How are u holding up tonight??

hugs,

[still hoping]

Hi mtn,

Been following your last few posts... Are you sure that email was even from your xh? Could OW have intercepted it again? And replied without xh's knowledge?

Just a thought.

still

[myturnnow]

Hi Still..

Hey, thanks for the post!

Yah, I thought it was probably from her. Irregardless, XH is a putz for letting her do it..and if he doesn't know and she has his blackberry, she is a loon and a half and it's his problem.

On a different note..

I HAVE AN URGENT MESSAGE!

six black lab mix puppies were found on a highway in Chad's Ford PA..I got the email this a.m. If we don't find homes for them they only have a week or so before Animal Control gets a hold of them. (according to my friends cousin who is keeping them in a kennel in her basement)

They are deflead, dewormed and in great shape.

AND SOOO CUTE WITH WHITE MARKING ON THEIR CHESTS!!

If anyone, I mean anyone is interested let me know..send a p.m. and I will check today..

I will send you a pic and a contact email address..

I would take one but I may be getting another dog that is my uncle's who is in the hosptial with inoperable cancer..

Labs are GREAT!!

THANKS!!

[inmyplace]

MTN,

One of my mother's favorite places in the world was the Chadds Ford Inn.

As for the stuff with your H, I had two thoughts.
1) F*** it.
2) Kill 'em with kindness.
It is what it is.