There and Back, #7

[SallyM]

thanks ladies. I actually knew about the flowers a couple of months ago, but seeing the site just reminded me about it. its one of the few things I never confronted him on, btw (I did about the valentine ones...he sent her the same roses he sent me this past year. ouch.)

I'm doing okay tonight. I am. I feel okay. honestly, I don't believe she is temporary. I know my H, and the things he has done over and over to prove himself to her are pretty significant.

but you know, I think it was neph here said, what would D change for me. I talked it over with my therapist today, and a lot of what it would change would be negative right now (mainly $). but eventually in order to move on for real, I'll need to consider it...unless he gets there first, of course. interesting point, btw, mk, about him needing her to be different than me/him needing to treat her differently. he does sooo much more for her, gives her sooo much. I guess I'm too easy going, not high maintenence enough. who knows. trust me, I would love 2 dozen roses for my birthday...but they aren't necessary. maybe for her they are. or maybe they aren't for her, but are for him to give her.

when we got engaged, I consider us to be engaged the day we sat at the kitchen table in our jammies making future plans. I didn't need a ring, I didn't need any of it, as much as I enjoy diamonds (hey, they are my birthstone, after all, lol). He considers us to have gotten engaged 2 weeks later when he surprised me with the ring, the down on one knee, uber romantic proposal. don't get me wrong, I LOVE my ring, and LOVE the proposal, but I think there is part of him that was bugged by the fact that I even said that first time that I didn't need a ring. but we were poor/struggling then, the ring wasn't what was important to me...spending my life with the man I loved was.

mk, interesting that your H babysits OW. he is sooo insecure, isn't he? plus, being a cheater, he knows that it is perfectly possibly (even expected, likely) for the person you are with to cheat, also.

hmmm

lwb, that is the scummiest thing ever that he gave her a mothers day card/gift and nothing for you, the mother of his children. just disgusting.

H didn't get me anything. my kids took me out to breakfast (I told them they were, lol) and he invited himself along. overall, a really nasty weekend...lots of really awful stuff that weekend. I suppose I don't know if he got her something, but somehow I doubt it. won't go snooping to find out, though. nope. not gonna.

not doing much tonight. not sulking, not crying, not sad or weepy at all (for now!). will curl up on the couch and watch the conclusion of The War. lots of sadness tonight, but also jubilition.