Cac, I agree with you. I think I've essentially "checked out of my M too", and if I examine the reasons it leads me to that banging against a brick wall feeling. That and feeling like I was coercing her to do things she preferred not to. For example, as much as I love "going down", she no longer lets me do it. By disengaging, I've been able to focus more on myself, and specifically what about me I need to work on. At least I am feeling happier than I have in a long time, and that's something. Makes it hard to find the motivation to re-engage though.
