Would you have normally spoken to your H like that in the past? If not, then I think it was good. You were honest about your feelings, you didn't get enraged and started accusing or blaming.
I had to think about that one. I think the answer is no, I wouldn't have said to him clearly "I'm angry with you because..." I'm good at being angry and going silent, but less good at articulating calmly. Still working on the calmly part.
Since the talk, H has made himself pretty scarce when he's home. He's back to obviously feeling uncomfortable around me, not saying much, leaving as small a footprint on the house as possible (not eating here, hanging out out front instead of in the backyard with me).
Last night for the first time in weeks he's stayed home on his "night off" (from me and the kids). I went to sleep with the kids, so we didn't interact at all anyway. The other night he stayed out until 5, I think.
I have no idea what all this is about. It just feels like we're back to where we were a few weeks ago. I've got less of a focus on H right now---a huge relief---and he's feeling however he's feeling. I'm cheery and friendly, looking him in the eye, and he's looking skittish.
Originally Posted By: S.T. _I Made It!
Now just remember don't do that all the time. keep those R talks few and far between for the most part.
Indeed. And his standoffishness makes me think there's another one brewing. We didn't clarify anything, and I'm pretty sure he's itching to move out.
His parents are in town next week, which promises to be awkward for H (he hasn't told them what's going on).
