Plank removed from my eye, too late for WAW? 6

[waw1978]

I can relate to the girls thinking your apt is not home. My D4 was telling me all week that she HATES my place and misses Daddy...Feels great to be me. I am the evil mother who moved out.

[Heimlich]

Yeah, sucks. At least I only get a disappointed "oh" from Casey when she asks where we're going and I say to our apartment. She cried for 20 minutes Saturday night -- total, uncontrollable sobbing -- because she was mad at me for moving out and missed her mama and her Barbie game crapped out.

At least they do enjoy spending time with me and I them. And they do like their bedroom and the big TV.

BD

[PMA_Baby!]

Sounds like you're doing the best you can with what you got. That's all any of us can do for now.

Keep it up bud.

BM07

[Gone Dancin']

BM07,

Sorry, but I've just gotta say that every time I read your signature I hear "bowel movement #7"! I think it's just because BM is the abbreviation for bowel movement on daycare baby records.

Again, sorry but I just had to get that out (no pun intended)!

GD

[PMA_Baby!]

I know that's funny. Heim said the same thing. I guess it's still appropriate since the marriage has gone down the sh&tter

Hey I was wondering if I could get your comments on my post as well if you have some time. I really enjoy reading your comments. There are so many insightful people on this board. I also am seriously considering the ski trip to ID in Feb. I'll let u know.

thanks, Broken

[waw1978]

PS:

Heim is your daughter Casey named after a certain Dead song?

Just curious.

[Heimlich]

Nope. We were batting around a few names and she just looked like a Casey. Who knew it was popular that year. There's Casey's (boys and girls) coming out of the woodwork here.

BD

[alk24]

I went to college with a girl named Casey Jones! I think it's really cute.

[Gone Dancin']

Since we're playing a name game now, my great grandpa's name was Woody Cox (NOT KIDDING!) Before the days of caller ID, he got many a late night prank call...

GD

[Puddle]

Hey Heim,

Good to see you back here.

If anything gets me to regress and talk to my W about a retro weekend or asking her to put a hiatas on pursuing OM, the way the girls are starting to behave will. I don't know if I'm strong enough to watch them hurt without saying something to my W.

Heim, I totally understand what you're saying. This sucks for you and mostly for the girls. They're probably confused, angry, and scared. I know you're angry with W because of this; I know I'm p*ssed as hell at H for even considering putting the kids through this, for minimizing the impact it'll have on them, for seeming to care too little about them to put them before his own happiness.

But Heim, if you decide you have to say something about it, she won't hear it. She can't right now. All she'll hear is, "Blah blah blah blah you're hurting the kids blah blah blah I want you back and I'm willing to use them to hurt you blah blah blah." She cannot hear you.

And believe me, I'm talking to myself here as much as I am to you.

My point is, yes, she's hurting the kids, but telling her so won't help---your M or your kids.

If you're just so angry you could spit and you want to let it out on her, go ahead. But it's not going to help your girls. Think carefully about what your motivation is: Do you want to hurt your W or do you want to help your girls by doing everything you can to get back together?

I think you want to hurt her right now. I know I want to hurt H sometimes, to snap him out of this fog and show him what havoc he's wreaking. I might be able to hurt him, but I can't get him out of the fog, and neither can you with your W.

I'll pop in here and there, but I've gotta take a break from reading about everyone and focus on me for a little while.

I think taking a break to focus on you sounds really good. I'll miss you dearly, but it sounds like it's what you need.

Take care, (((((Heim))))))