Go see a lawyer. This is business now. Don't let your desire to do *right* by your kids, or her affect your judgment.
You are not to blame here, do not be a martyr.
Keeping the house is good for the kids. But why would you move out? I did that and I regret it, plus it impacted my custody rights.
Please allow me to be blunt: you seem all focused on money. Doing right by your kids means so much more than money. Your custody rights must be protected. They need their father, not just his money.
What arrangements do you have now? You are keeping the kids overnight some of the time, are you not? If not, you need to, for them and in order to protect yourself. She had no right to remove the kids from your home anyway; I will go so far as to say you may still be able to insist they be returned since she only left a month ago.
Quote:
pay the rent for a nice place for my W and kids to live so they can be out of her parent's house
Why? Let her figure out where to live and how to pay for it. She will only resent you more if you offer this. Instead, buy her out of the house if you can and get her to sign the deed to you.
This all may impact your custody rights; that is why a lawyer is important here. The lawyer will also help you figure out suitable child support. And protect yourself against paying her alimony as well - she can work, she had a good job. Time for her to realize that she needs to pound the pavement and get a job.
She got onto you about the money, now she needs to look in the mirror.
Divorce sucks but the best thing to do Mark is to look after you and your kids. Let her swim on her own.
