Patti, I feel for you. I've been dealing w/similiar instances for quite some time. I'm lucky in one respect, I don't have children, so I can pretty much go on my merry way. You, on the other hand, have children that require time w/their father.
I think that what goes through their minds is that they aren't happy w/what they've done and their lives haven't turned out the way that they thought they would, therefore, when they see that you've moved on and are carving out a new and happy life, it drives them into overload and they feel like they need to poke us every now and then. They actually aren't happy to see us happy. They become envious and jealous that we've done so well. Does this make sense?
The best advice that I can give you is don't show him that he's driving you crazy. Do what you have to do to communicate w/him about the children, but don't react to anything else he says or does. I know it's hard, but you've got to find a way not to show how he's driving you nuts.
I had hoped that your xh would have settled down and would be leaving you alone by now. It just goes to show you that you don't miss what you have until it's gone or someone else is in the picture, i.e., sharing in what use to be his life w/you.
