Puddle, I have been reading your thread and I understand your sitch about what to tell the kids. My kids S 18, D 20 and both in college. The week before we took my S to college, I asked my W when we were going to tell both of them. She said that she told them 2 weeks before. I hit the roof and told her that she had no ****ing right to tell them without me. She told them that Dad and I are getting divorced. Well I talked to my S and told him the truth, and wanted my W to be there, and she said no. Believe me, it doesn't matter what age your kids are, they will be affected. My son doesn't want to come home now because of what is going on. My W says that she doesn't want to involve them, but even the counselor said that she wasn't thinking straight. My D is still living at home and I havn't talked to her about it because I don't want her schooling to be affected. Unfortunately the WAS only thinks of themselves and don't realize that they are affecting every one else. I can't imagine what my S is going thru--first time away from home in a new place with strangers, and his mom wants to walk away. Funny thing though, kids are very smart at any age, he told me that mom is acting on emotion and not being rational. I think he could be a good therapist! Chin up, just be good to your kids and try not to involve them in your troubles. I know it is hard, but you may want to explain that mom and dad need to work things out, but that each of you want the best for them and will be there for them when they need you.
