My life don't fit the book, please help.

[lester]

I do feel better thinking more like a man. My goal with doing pool was just to blow off steam not really hide per se. I am flexible and spending time with my kids is just as therapeutic, probably more so. I had a babysitter planned too, so I wouldn't be dumping on her. I do hope for success although somewhat fearful for what that means -- I mean I hope she GROWS some too. I do see little changes in me accumulating but from what I posted you only know what she thinks she's been missing. There's hurt here too. I actually thought about divorcing her at year 2, and year 5 of the marriage. I didn't of course because I have morals and the willingness to try to get through it to the other side. That's a story for another day though...