Still at my parent house for now. They've been away since the spring and won't be back for another month or so. So I've had the house all to myself for a good while. I suspect I'll be here a while longer too since I am out of work again. Got laid off at the end of June from the start up I went to work with in the winter. I've got a few prospects but it's tough going with my last position being only 5 months.
At this point I have no idea which way we are going. One day it seems we are pointed in the right direction and others it seems she could care less. Interestingly we had another good conversation, at least I thought so, and she finally articulated what it was she's been looking for for so long and how she realized she had failed at nurturing our marriage. I am not sure if she's willing to work at it at all, a little or just can't anymore. I hope she can at least give it the attention she is giving other things in life too. I really can see that we can work it all out but we both have to commit to it. Therein sits the challenge, will she commit to it? It seems she waiting to see actions by me that stir her to say yes. So here I sit trying to figure out how to go about doing that now.
Ultimately she wants security. She wants to know someone else is providing for her and the family, protecting them, caring for them, fussing over them, etc. She wants to be a stay at home mom and not have to worry about earning a living to pay the bills. When she said all of this the other day I took it to me she would like me to do those things and they are things I am wanting to do. But doing things that married couples do for one another to nurture an relationship is, at its core, pursuit and I am not sure that will work. It's all so confusing.
Last edited by catfan; 09/28/0706:09 PM.
If we really want to love, we must learn how to forgive. - Mother Theresa
