Differentiation doesn't mean you stop communicating, or telling someone how you feel.
No but if someone is not willing to communicate with you then how do you communicate with them? If you are pissed off with their pissed off attitude whose feelings are they? *I* am quite happy in myself. If H were not around at all then I am totally fine. The second he steps through the door the atmosphere chills by 10 degrees. Are those my feelings or his? If I am fused then I would say "you're making me feel terrible". If I don't want to be fused then I try to detatch from the atmosphere he is generating. Or am I getting it all wrong?
Karen, Yes I guess he is grumpy about getting older, but he is always grumpy about something, and it is always me that puts up with someone acting like they ought to be rescued but that I ought to know how to do that without being told.
Thanks for the hug - I needed that.
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
