This also posted under "Newcomers"

[saffie]

GISH,

Had to come back home and write to you again.

I didn't know about this place when I crashed and burned. I couldn't learn from the very wise people on here because I didn't know it existed. Please, if you are able, listen to others that have been where you are.

I don't understand the relevance of Single Again posting Dutchman's last post to you - only because I don't think you are ready to learn from it. Single wants to help you. If you look at the time he has been registered, and the number of posts he makes, he obviously discriminates about who he posts to. You are lucky that he is posting to you - I just don't know how receptive you are to his advice at the moment.

When he asks you about have you read Divorde Remedy and Divorce Busting - he is not being critical, in my humble opinion. If you know if someone has read certain things you can direct them to areas that you think will be relevant or discuss things with them you know they have read about.

Your details are sketchy. Not much background on you. I know I tell the world and his wife about me but we do need to know a bit to get a feel for you.

I am very worried about you. Your sitch is nowhere near as black as you are obviously feeling based on what you have posted. Standing on the outside looking in it is easier to see that.

Do you know how to navigate these boards? Do you know the personal message thing doesn't work? I'm sorry if what I am asking appears trivial but I am not sure at what level you are functioning. When I was as down as you I could hardly use a can opener!!!

Firstly look at those things you can control. No.1 on top of that list is you and your Positive Mental Attitude. Small things make a big difference on this. Break your day down into chunks you can deal with. Don't always look at the big picture. Breathe. Put on some loud cheerful music. Nothing about love and relationships. I love Billie Holiday. I would listen to her and then would wonder why I was depressed - duh. I know things like that are obvious but I couldn't see it at the time.

Think about nice things like your son - how great he is etc - when you feel yourself sliding into dark thoughts ; do something that takes your mind off things completely, ( I do SUDOKU. A fiendish needs all my concentration and stops my head spinning) Get some exercise - it's good for your mind, body and soul.

Tell me about your usual daily routine. It's good to post these things publicly so that other people can chip in with good advice and suggestions but if you don't feel comfortable with that email me.

Please let me know you are ok.

I think that's enough for you to digest for now.

(((((HUGS))))))))

Saffie