You asked does this mean anything to me yes it does, it is making me look like a fool – and it really seems like he is punishing me. But why bother, if he wants other OW why does he not just have her and move on and let me go, why should I be is fall back women. I believe in the beginning he wanted to save face and tell everyone it’s a “trial separation” which is really just so he does not look like a A hole, its out there now everyone knows so we no longer need to hide it. At one time he said to me what if I am wrong about leaving, well if he’s wrong he has to live with his error.
The whole time this has been going on he has not made any moves in my direction at all, yes that is because I have not backed off, but as I told him how do you fix something if you don’t work at it or don’t know if you want to work at it, what does he think he is just going to wake up one morning and think I may go back to W today.
What about what this is doing to me, I have questioned every part of myself and it made me feel so low that I thought I must be such a terrible person like he says. Which is BS, I am a wonderful person and might I say a great catch.
I just don’t want to play the game anymore, life is to short and I believe I can walk away from this with my head held high. I don’t believe any body is worth that much. We have no kids so we do not have to have any contact and I am young enough to move on and meet someone else. But by him fence sitting it is not letting me move on we need to cut all ties for me to do this, also if he does not want me, let him live with the consiquenses.
He has till end of October to at least try to meet me half way then I will re evaluate the situation otherwise I will stick by my plans and tell him in Dec that we need to sell up and move on in the new year, I have nothing really to loose, I will walk away financially secure and begin again.
I also agree with the washing thing but I am trying to be the bigger person and I feel really guilty when I act like a btich. Also I don’t really like the person he has become, if he can treat me with that much disrespect after 15 years he is not worth it.
I know I have come across really angry, part of me is and another part says this can not go on indefinitely and the more he treats me like [censored] the easier it will be to go and by then I will be a lot stronger and will not be sucked back in by any of his bs.
Maybe the M has really just run its course and both of us are hanging in out of fear of the unknown.
