Just be careful - you are so near getting what I thought you wanted. Which lies in particular are bothering you at the moment - the secrecy from the family? The OM? All of it? Are you wondering if you do want to be with her?
Saffie
This is trueSaffie, I want so much to clearthis up and move on hopefully as a family. yoy don't know how much I want you and yoyo to tell me next week. "see Manuel you were so Worried. arn't you glad you sent that letter?"
Saffie, I venting. but like her I havebeen holding back and I think if it does not go the way I hope there will be a blow out. I will be releasing all of this pent up anger.I am sure for the fisrt time in 18 years there will be name calling
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
That was 5 months ago - you are right. A lot has changed and she has seen your changes. Now she probably realises she needs to change to keep you.
If she was going to go she would be gone by now. You have proved by your actions that you will work at things. Do not bottle this now by going in making false assumptions that could harm you.
You do not have a monkey on you shoulder - you are fine. I'll come skinny dipping and keep you company!!!LOL There's a big pond between us - now where did that come from?
There's been a thread called something like 'could I have hurt my wife with sex'. On it someone has posted a massive article about sex and women. Part of it covers probs with menopausal women. Go have a read. It may help you if your W talks about this when she finally talks to you.
Maybe she is worried about you going back to work - maybe she is worried you may dump her what with you being in work and her not. There are just so many maybe's and without talking to her you will never find out what is fact and what is fiction. Maybe she is trying to get up courage to initiate something physical. I had to get drunk for the first time I did it after each baby because I wasn't sure what to expect. Jeeze - I would need some courage after not doing it for so long on top of having cheated - imagine how she would feel if she got rejected by you - that must be a real possibility in her mind.
Hold it together. Post and vent on here. Voice your fears etc, but keep up your fantastic PMA with your W. I am jus so hopeful for you.
((((((HUGS))))))))
Saffie
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
If you think there will be a blow out then get your son out of the house first. Don't let him find out what his mum did that way - it hurts the kids so much.
Try please to wait until you go back to work and send that letter. You have been patient so long do not blow it now.
You are one of my lifesavers on here. Keep strong.
Saffie
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
You know, if you haven't argued in 18yrs you are due one hell of a blow out. I had a week of hell as you know but then it all fell into place. If it is stormy at the beginning do not assume it is the end - it shows passion and caring and feelings.
You take care
Saffie
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
