>>he hates it wants me to stop talking to his family. Has even said he will talk less to ow(supposed to be good friend; 20 calls and 80 texts in one month. yeah right) if i stop talking to his family.<<

How manipulative!!! If it's so easy for him to give up talking to OW why doesn't he just give her up entirely? Of course you should stay friends with his family... aren't those their grandkids? If my divorce had gone through I'd still have maintained a friendship with my in-laws. If you like these people, and they like you, there's no reason you should ever stop being in contact with them regardless of where your marriage goes. How ridiculous!!! Don't give in to his childishness.

There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.