I think the finances stuff is lose-lose. You need to protect yourself but you don't want to set your H off. Here's an example of what can happen... My XH was talking about buying a house, so I didn't want to go to the bank one day and find out that he pulled out all $10K that we had, so about one week into our separation, I pulled out half. He found out about a week later and came over yelling and screaming at me...He told me, "I can't believe you did this to me. "She" said you would do that and I stood up for you and said that you wouldn't". I just told him that I only took my half because I didn't want him to buy a house with it. He responded with "Do you think that was going to stop me? I can't believe you did this to me it cuts so deep. I don't care if God himself told you to do it. You shouldn't have. I want my half."
There is absolutely no reasoning with someone like this. In the end I don't know if it mattered that I took the money out, but I can tell you that our finances have been split since that day. It probably drove him further away but then again, I might have lost all my savings otherwise...it really is lose-lose...and the worst is no matter how much you want to trust him...you can't because he's not the same person anymore.
M:28, D finalized: 8/28/07 Current Thread
"When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile."
