muddled and angry: Puddle's sencond thread

[Heimlich]

And re telling the kids: I want it to be clear to them that this is papa's choice and NOT what I want. But I want to do what's best for them, too. Anyone have words of wisdom re telling them (and what???)?

Puddle,

I totally understand and symphathize with your desire to place the blame on your H. However, that doesn't do your kids any good. Don't put them in the middle. That's putting them in the middle, IMO. Be direct, be honest, say something along the lines of mama and daddy aren't making each other happy. We love each other, but not like a mama and daddy should (can't remember how old your kids are, maybe just say H and W). This has nothing to do with you. M and D love you very, very much.

I'm not going to lie, this conversation is going to suck. My W didn't even have the guts to start it; I had to. Keep it short, keep it simple, don't place blame on each other, don't put them in the middle, show them all the love and support that you can. Try to have the visitation figured out in advance for if they ask, but for the initial conversation, don't think it's really necessary to give them the scheduling. They won't digest it anyway.

Good luck, Puddle.

BD