I'm not sure if there will be a place for H in my life either, beyond friendship.
and this,
Quote:
But it will take a long time to rebuild the trust.
I saw your post late last night and wasn't quite sure what to say. But it was good to see your caution today. To be honest, your post last night had a feel of you getting sucked in.
I know your H has a long way to go. And he really needs to see a shrink (or at least a professional therapist). The other thing I thought (last night) was what your attorney said to you predicting this exact behavior and suggesting that you don't get pulled back in. Attorneys have seen this stuff very often. My BIL is an attorney and it is uncanny how well he can nail a situation. So I was thinking that perhaps you might ask your attorney how to proceed.
I understand your hope and concern for your H, your children and grandchildren. But be careful when people feel they have nowhere else to go, they are perfectly content to go back to the last safe place and not fix a d@mn thing. Your H needs to fix himself before he can even begin to fix anything else. And at his age, that's not an easy thing.
Your H needs professional help.
Good luck, Val. And again, I was glad to see your post today. It clarified a couple concerns in my mind.