Wantlove! Finally a kin! My H has been gone since Jan. 06. During this time he has never contacted but he sends flowers for "special" days. He not only cut off from me and his daughter but his parents.
You are not alone with a cave dweller. It is easier and harder. You will wonder and ache, wanting any contact. You have the right idea. Zero expectations. I don't know when or if my H will ever reappear but for DD birthday he sent her chocolate covered strawberries and the enclosed note said "Please forgive me for my weakness". They are not leading a wonderful life. Give him time and space. Now, what wonderful plans will FILL your birthday next week? Be sooooo busy that there isn't time to crumble. Gather your friends and throw yourself a party! Don't take the silence for not thinking or caring. He may be caring and hurting so bad that he can't respond. Think the postive (heheheheh - positive being...he is so miserable without you that he can't bare it even as hard as he is trying to run) I had crab legs in bed with my daughter and went to a movie. It was wonderful!
Sitting quietly doing nothing, the flowers bloom effortlessly.
bomb: Jan 25, 2006 not seen since DD moved in with H - 9/1/08 H filed for divorce - 11/2008 Divorce dismissed by courts - 4/2010 still nothing
