I, too, lost my job 4 months after my separation (and 2 weeks after finding out my W had started dating a guy from her work). I've also lost all of my family over the last 7 yrs (except for my father, who I never grew up with).
This is what you might call hitting rock bottom.
You and I are basically in the same place (however, I have been lucky enough to be set financially, so I was able to avoid the financial strain of losing my job).
I don't really have any advice to give you (sorry). I can relate to your sitch, though, and I do feel for you a great deal. I think the best thing you can do is grieve this new loss and get back on that horse as soon as you can. Create a new resume, get some good recommendations from some high-up people in your old work place, and go out and get busy finding a new job that keeps you financially on track (and also keeps you busy and therefore keeps you from emotionally dwelling on your sitch and its current state).
Doing the above will show your W that you are strong, and that your are able to take the bull by the horns. Your W and the people around you will see and admire your courage and strength, and value this quality. This experience will make you stronger IF YOU LET IT. Grieve it, but respect it for what it can/will do for you emotionally and spiritually, and get back to business as soon as you can.
Quote:
My wife said "Don't say that, the year isn't over yet".
What does that mean? Does she mean I'll find another job and everything will be fine? Does she mean that 2007 isn't over yet, it could get better, ie: Us getting back together?
It's hard to say what that means, and you could drive yourself into the dirt analyzing what it means. One thing is for sure -- don't throw yourself a pity party WITH YOUR W. Don't show her weakness, hopelessness, despair, etc. You and I both know it is unattractive. You don't want her pity, you want her LOVE and RESPECT. You will gain the latter if you show her your ability to demonstrate grace under fire. And hopefully, you will regain her love for you by being constistent with this attitude, as well as your necessary changes that you've made (don't know if you've made changes or what they may be, but I'm speculating that you have made some).
Again, don't dwell on what she means. Also, now you've talked to her about it -- don't go to her anymore. Go to someone else: friends, family, this board, etc. But don't go to her about it anymore. Show her that you don't NEED her shoulder to lean on. If she brings it up to you, show her your strength -- but also show her your strength through you actions, not words.
Hope that helps -- post on your thread anything else that you would like to get feedback on or vent about, and I'll try to check on you there too.
