First off, sorry for everything that you've been through over the past while. Been watching, but not posting.
Not sure whether I'd do you any good or not. Let me address this in a slightly different order than you posted it.
I'm guessing this is probably not a good idea, so I'm trying to hold off. but I want to.
I guess that depends on what your objective is, and what his motivations REALLY ARE when he's crying, prying at you for details about you....
okay, someone stop me. I want to e-mail him in the worst way.
Ultimately, you apply the 24/48 hour rule. And at the same time, you ask the question "Is this likely to bring me closer to my goal or further away from it?"
This, of course, depends on some incomplete information, i.e. whether he's really reaching out, opr whether he'd see your email as needy, clingy... whatever. You can't know his thoughts/motivations, but you're the one in the best position to know for sure.
I want to tell him that I hope he's okay...I want to tell him I'll always want him to be okay. that I do care about him. that I wish I could be more "normal" with him. that I hate us being apart and distancing myself from him.
Two things about this:
1) Do you think that he already knows this, and if so, why would he need to hear it again?
2) Ask yourself whether you are detaching or withdrawing?
Where I'd define withdrawl as disengaging from him to protect yourself emotionally (withholding support he may be asking for, for instancce) and detachment is simply not being as emotionally affected by him and his actions.
