Still Seperated and Hopeful

[mcojh]

Well the old expectations got me again. I thought that with CW talking counseling, that maybe she would be having a change of heart about the weekend away thing.

This AM she called and the talk turned to the weekend. She said that she is still going, and that it is a group thing and I don't understand. I asked her to explain and she said she couldn't right now (she was at work).

I told her it is hard for me to think that she is really considering working on our M when she is going away with the FFOM. (No I don't call him that to her.) She said that she really needs to get away, that she feels suffocated at her apartment. She also said that she feels like she is going to lose it.

I point blank asked her if she was considering seeing a C so she could tell people she tried or if she was doing it because she thought that we had a chance. She replied, "A little of both."

She also told me that after this weekend she is not going to have contact with the FFOM until after the D. Which sounded odd at first being as we are considering seeing a C, then she corrected it to saying that she needs to make the decisions on her own without any other influences.

This very well could be BS. I am too confused right now. She was crying again when she talked about her apartment. I ended the call because I felt sick.

One thing I told her was that I had no right to demand anything of her, but I wish she wouldn't go. Probably a mistake but who knows.

Advice?