It is finally out, he wants a D

[HSSweetheart]

Thank you Dom R. I am in a bad spot and have turned here again. H said he wants an "in house" separation. I don't know how much longer I can ride the rollercoaster. I am so depressed. I am either angry or sad. No in between hardly. Took the kids camping this weekend - alone. Called on the way home to be sure I was going right. ON the third call I was told that I was a pain in the ass, so I hung up. I have barely spoken to him since. I decided that if he doesn't like what I have to say I will say nothing. That includes asking the kids to do anything. He thinks I should ask them nicely--basically pleed with them to do the chores and things they should be doing. They won't do it whether I am nice or not and I get no respect from anyone in the house. S11 thinks acting like H is cool. He now sides with him and ridicules me at any chance. And doesn't listen to me. So I have basically just given up on that. For now anyway. I have no strength left to fight. I am ready to tell H to move out. That will take all the strength I can muster....S11 reports everything I say and do to him. I just can't take it anymore. I have stopped doing anything for H will will please some people. I can't work, can't sleep. I can't remember anything. Forgot to pick something up last night. I have always been a very organized person but that is all going straight to hell. My mind is so occupied I can remember nothing now. Monday is our 19th wedding anniversary. I may just lose it. I am not going to say anything, just go to work as usual an act like it is any other day. But it won't be. Even my support group is sick of my sitch. Only 2 people showed up last week besides myself. I am not going this week. I would go back to a therapist if I could afford. Work only allows 3 free visits a year and I have had them already. So basically I have nothng and no one to talk to. My parents died 15 yrs ago so I have no family. My mom was divorced once, I could so use her support right now.