mkulta gave you some good words of wisdom. You wife is harboring a lot of anger and resentment towards you right now. All is not lost, but you will have to do a lot of work, learn not to allow what she says to get to you (you can not control how she treats you, but you can control how you let it affect you, think Buddhist), find patience you never though possible. Get that DR book into your hands and read it. Light bulbs will start to go on in your head. Then start to apply what you learn from the book. For now, until you read the book.
1. Stop talking to her about the relationship (unless she brings it up and then only listen to her and validate what she is saying, you do not need to agree just validate).
2. Work on yourself, focus on you happiness (people like to be around happy people, not miserable people).
3. Do not vent to her, vent you frustrations here (your anger will only fuel her anger).
4. Be as nice and cordial with her as you can, be her friend (she will find it hard to fight with you if you are nice to her, she will try and she may even get irritated by it, but she will stop the anger rampage sooner).
5. Cease any behavior that has placed your R to where it is at today.
More questions. You have mentioned that she does not trust you. Why is that? What has happened for her to feel that way? Also, what are the behaviors she is saying that you have had in the past that have made her feel the way she does today?
“Do you want to be RIGHT or want to be LOVED” “You have to have a life to share a life with someone” “When you stop resisting, you start learning”
