Yes, I am Back

[CabanaBoy]

So, I've been the cool calm collected person lately and it is all working for the better. I'm DBing, not to push X into my arms, it just works our better for me that way. I limmit calls, I don't ask to speak to X when she calls the girls and tell the girls I don't need so speak to mommy. I'm too busy to worrry about dealing with X.

Last weekend I had my girls Saturday through today, Tuesday. The girls spoke with the X and told her what we all did, etc. They told X that my GF spent the night, which was not true. I had an 8am business meeting Saturday and the GF came over at 7am when the girls where asleep. They woke up to the GF in the condo and me gone, my girls new I was at a meeting because we talked about it. The just assumed GF spent the night because they saw her at my place at night and then first thing in the morning. I have more respect for my girls and myself to have GF spend the night when they are there.

I emailed the X about some school stuff about the girls and church items to sync our schedules. The email was all business, to the point. She responded with the usual responses about what she will attend or won't attend, etc. Then there was this little comment that she made that I thought was very telling about her life and the way she raises the girls when they are with her.

She said that since my GF spends the night, that I shouldn't have a problem with her BF spending the night with her and the girls. I thought "My GF didn't spend the night and I sure as hell would not approve of her BF spending the night."

I wrote back, first going over some "school" items and then ended the email saying that my GF didn't spend the night, that I have more respect for the girls and myself, that our girls have gone through enough and do not deserve to see our private lives played out in front of them. I wrote that I will not allow my GF to spend the night, I accept the same from you but it is your choice and you have to live with that diceision.

She also wrote who her BF was, it is this used car salesman that is Muslim and has dumped her I believe 3 times. He leaves X for younger women, then somehow comes back to X. I could care less about him but something from a few years ago doesn't sit well with me and I'll tell you why.

When my youngest was 2, X and her BF were at former MIL's house drinking and shooting fireworks on the 4th of July. BF of X gives my then 2year old sparklers in each hand. She got scared and dropped one into the iinside of her elbow, closing ther arms togher, giving her 2nd and 3rd degree burns. She put bandages on her and sent her to daycare. When my dad and I picked up my girls the next day, the dayschool owner spoke to me and asked if I had seen my D's arms. I said no and she showed me the burns. She took pix and documented what happened.

X first told me that the X gave her the sparklers and then she changed her story and said she gave the sparklers to D. I was DBing at the time and remained cool. It was too late to do anything about the burns because they were 2 days old and treated by the school. There is a report on file at the school kept there until D turns 18.

The other part is that I am Catholic, my girls are Babtized Catholic and the oldest is studying for her first communion. I spoke with X and said since we both professed to God in church that we will raise our girls Catholic. We further spoke and agreed that the girls can do whatever they want when they are 18 but we will raise them Catholic. X is Lutheran, close enough to Catholosism and X's dad is very religous.

Since we go to church with my parents, we talk about Jesus, mass, why we Catholic, why we go to churhc, etc. Well, one day the girls tell me that mommy said Jesus isn't real, he is make believe. I thought "Great, here we go now."

I spoke to X and asked her about the commment, she said that Jesus never lived, he only lived in the Bible. I asked her why she would say such a thing when other religions refer to him as a Prophet? She went to Sunday school, she went to church, WTF?

Turns out the X is now an Athiest, she said so in front of my face. I said "This has nothing to do with the fact you are dating a Muslim guy, is it?" She wouldn't admit to it, but she was a Christian since she was born. I cannot figure this out but it does go with her M.O. When we first dated, she started taking Italian language classes and talked all the time about Italian this and Italian that. Just to let you know, I am Italian.

So, I thought this joker was gone, the BF. He is the one I have written about on this thread. It was he who burned my D, it was he who told the kids that the muslim religion is better than Chrisianity, it was he that tells my kids pork is bad for them and now it is he that X wants to have spend the night.

I don't know about all of you reading this because there are more things that meet the eye and much more to the story than I can stand to write. I am very grounded right now, not even irked but I think I might have to step in and do something about this. Maybe speak with X's BF directly, I don't know but I don't want him spending the night. All I can do is express my concerns with X and the rest is up to her.

I don't want something to happen because then it will be too late. This guy has been in and out of my X's life for 4 years now, dumping her and from what the girls say, treating X badly in front of them.

What are your thought?