I was almost a WAW (and still am-- in my heart?)

[Dom R]

I don't know how to respond to that Dom. You really don't believe me, do you? That hurts.

I'm sorry that you got that impression, Sandi.

I DO believe you. I am in no way saying that you dont feel bad.
I'm truely sorry that you are going through a difficult time.

What I meant to convey in my post, is that life doesnt stop when you feel bad, or tired, etc. Nor does your marriage.
Every day, is a chance to either draw closer, or further away, in your marriage.

Sometimes, people use "I dont have the energy" as an excuse not to do things. I'm not saying that they really dont feel tired... what I'm saying is that if it was something that they thought "had to be done", or if it was something that was really truely enjoyable to them... they usually find a way to get it done.

You may be at the point where you really cant do ANYTHING right now; if so, I apologise for misunderstanding. I thought that you were feeling better these days, and that the worst had passed.

Even with all that, though... maybe try reading what I wrote again, and try to frame it in a "helpful" light?

The idea I was trying to convey is that, even if you have zero energy to "actively" do anything... you can still choose to allow things that promote closeness between your husband and yourself.

I'm trying to encourage you to keep doing that.

How much you ask for, or suggest to him, depends on how much pain you are in.
A thought for you, though:
Your husband loves you. he doesnt want you to be in pain. he wants to do something to help you and make you feel better.

I bet that even if you dont even have the energy to lift your arms and legs... he would be happy to just sit/lay next to you, and just "be with you" for a while when you want.

It would make him feel better about things; both that he can be with you and maybe 'do' something by being there... and also for himself, to be next to you. Plus, that you asked him to be with you, will make him feel wanted and valued by you.

if you do even that much... who knows, it might be nice for you too?