I'll get right down to the meat and potatoes since we go back so far and all .
Have you checked that bitterness meter lately? It is understandable. I know all the work you did before and how happy you were to seemingly have busted your divorce, only to find that your wife was still a spoiled brat that never did intend to look at her own contributions to the state of your relationship. Yep. It would make anyone bitter. Check that, though. You will not get where you need to be in YOUR life, if you don't.
The whole 50/50 thing so many people try to do on this board is, in my opinion, completely self-serving. It's your last attempt to stick it to the woman that didn't lift so much as a finger in the end to help save your family. But do you know who ends up paying? The child. If your wife has primary physical custody you would get her every other weekend and a night or two during the week. That is standard and it is the suckiest part of a divorce HOWEVER, pressing for anything more is too stressful on the kids and I have seen enough to know it's the truth, not just my passing opinion. After working in two law firms dealing with family law, the kids that ended up the most jacked up emotionally and mentally were the ones who had a parent insisting on 50% custody. Like it or not, that is reality. Might be easy when they're 4 but you simply have to put the kid first when she starts school. We represent a man right now who is insisting on 50% custody of his son. You should see the hoops he has laid out for that boy to jump through (he calls it a "schedule") under the guise of it "just being fair". NEWSFLASH: DIVORCE AIN'T FAIR. Don't screw your kid further. Listen, her mother is enough of a headcase. She's getting the kid to ask you inappropriate questions that are quite frankly, none of her damn business after the mess she has done. You were doing great. She pulled the plug. The woman has serious issues but you having your daughter 50% of the time is just going to make her feel like a yo-yo when she should have a primary HOME, not TWO of them. She will never rest. Never be entirely at peace living out of her backpack or whatever she carries. Fight for it if you want. Think of this post 10 years from now, though. 50-50 only works in the RAREST of cases and that is with parents that get along with one another. I don't see that happening any time soon in your case based on what I have read.
Alrighty then. That's my unsolicited advice. I know things are bad now and it is likely to be you once again that has to swallow your pride and give in...don't do it for the wife. Do it for your daughter.
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