You probably need only one woman sitting on your porch. And one only. I can picture her now....with a cat carrying case, Herr Godfather Drosselmeier... and all his syringes...just a setting, at the dimming of the light, with her queenly bearing, and her brisk sense of what's right, what's wrong, and what's real. Miz Sara would whop your wife into shape if anybody could, and that would give us all warm cockles, even if we had to borrow some.