I really don't know. Perhaps she is upset that you are not 'interested' in her. That by not giving her any attention you are saying that you don't care. I do think that sometimes pride/ worry of getting hurt, can make both parties to a relationship back off so as to avoid being rejected and then a stalemate is reached.
Does her OM ever see you? Could he be really worried about you and how you are in really good shape etc and be putting pressure on her to stay away from you?
The way she sometimes talks about you dating other women makes me think that she would almost get off on somone else wanting you and her then proving that she can get you back. It's like maybe she wants others to desire you so that you are a 'trophy'-if someone else wnats you then you musy be worth having.
I think your W has got a screw loose anyways so god only knows what's going on in her brain!!!!!
Saffie
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
Saf, It is 11:25 pm over here. I decided to stay up and watch Aust v Fiji in the Rugby. It's half time.
I have to get up at 5 am in the morning, but couldn't go to sleep knowing the game was on.
It is hard to know what is going on in W's head. I don't think OM has ever seen me, I don't know what he looks like (other than what people have described). I think it was easier for me not to know (as far as visualising them together).
I have no idea about W and the avoidance. Definately something to ponder. I wonder if she is just avoiding her own feelings about you, and trying to give you space. I think miss saffie is right, that pride gets in the way when it comes to our spouses. She isn't blind, and has noticed all your changes. Maybe she is unsure these changes will 'stick'?
About family, oooooh yes. If they knew about H cheating, they would totally back me in a divorce. Scratch that, most would, my mom would say she supports me in what I decide, but in her head would support divorce. lol I, like saffie, have now learned to avoid the friends that make me feel even more like a doormat by saying "I can't believe you haven't kicked him out and filed". Does your W know how your parents feel about her?
Hope you have a good day at work. That's where I am too. Well, I am not at your office, don't worry..
My W sort of knows that my parents know. I did not disclose the true extent of how angry they are with her. She thinks that my parents think it is only a separation/divorce based on her wanting out, and that she is now seeing someone. I told them way back when, about how she had started the R with OM whilst I was away on a business trip for 6 weeks, then she decided to separate to pursue OM when I got back.
Also, they know it is physical, W assumes everyone thinks it is a friendship until after the D, like she has told her family. Her reasoning is "Its nobody's business what I do, they don't need to know."
Had a good day at work. I am exhausted though, stayed up to watch the whole game, got to bed at 1am and up again at 5am.
I've been reading your thread. I think lwb is right about your W and her avoidance. She's definitely noticed the changes. She's probably a little unsure what they mean and if they'll stick. I read somewhere that it takes several weeks before they are convinced the changes are real and for the long term. The oggling was a good sign. LOL
Me29 H33 D9 months S2 S9(previous R) Sep 8-19-07 I file 11-5-07 H home (Retro) 2-15-08 "Today is the tomorrow of yesterday." -- S9
