Granted that all the issues can not be dealt with on our own and there are many that need both to accomplish, but I am sure there are plenty that we can tackle on our own. How many things have our spouses told us in the past that they do not like or behaviors that we have had, that have pushed them away? Those are the things we need to deal with now, today. Be them behaviors of anger, control, depression, dependency, addiction, self pity, resentment, health, appearance, happiness, drive, blame, acceptance, etc. etc. The list may be endless. We obviously are not to blame 100% for where we are today, but rest assured we have all done our fair share and we need to eliminate those behaviors if we want a better R.
Bottom line is as OT stated, getting back together us useless if the issues that drove us a part to begin with still exist. To many of use that are separated make our main goal getting back together. When the goal should be getting our spouse to want to work on the R and take the steps to rebuild it. Not to get back under the same roof with the same ol problems.
“Do you want to be RIGHT or want to be LOVED” “You have to have a life to share a life with someone” “When you stop resisting, you start learning”
