What to do with a fence-sitter

[Have Faith]

Jak has some very valid points. If he is willing to go to counseling then I think that is your first step. You can not force him to give up OW especially given the situation. Do you know for sure that he is having an intimate relationship with her? Sounds like he is in contact because of the accident and not necessarily because of the relationship.

You state that you found out about the A in May. Most of the books I have read say that it take about 6 to 9 months for the A to die after it has been exposed. I'm just about at the 9 month mark myself and that is the direction his A has been taking over the last 6 weeks.

I know that it is hard to wait, but you need to start making a life for yourself. He will see the changes in you and he will be changing also. I have found it much easier for me when H has been moved out. What I don't know doesn't seem to hurt as much and I'm then able to be upbeat and nice wherever we are together. It took me about 6 months to get to that point though.

Keep posting on this board. You will feel better. There are so many others out there that really understand how you feel.

Faith