Yes, I am Back

[Just_Me]

I agree with your gf. She is sharing you emotionally. A large percentage of this post was asking if there was hidden meaning to your wife's action. You wonder if the fact you have a gf have anything to do with your wife's actions. I would say that you are very focused on her. The "power struggle" that you perceived may have actually been all in your head. It is possible that she sees herself as the real parent and it's a hassle to have to get approval for all that stuff. I've learned that my XW will do the same thing, but I'm not sure that it's with me in mind or not. If you want to be informed of school things, then get to school and do it yourself. Why, after being D this long are you still wondering what her motivations are? I would say that there is an emotional connection still that isn't healthy for a new relationship.

So my answers to your questions:
1) Why isn't she comfortable around you? Who is comfortable around their ex and why does it matter? Why do you want a "comfortable" relationship anyway? You are seeing someone else and your gf has ever reason to be upset. It would be very hard to be best buddies, especially since you have a girlfriend. Plus, your wife divorced you, and so she may not want you for anything other than the father of your shared kids.

2) She showed you the house. So what? You were once part of her life and are the father of her kids. Why wouldn't she? I think that sounds like human nature. She's happy with her house and so is willing to share that with you. It might not mean anything in terms of feelings for you, but I get the feeling that you think that's what it could mean. I saw my XW's house when she bought it too and that was like 4 years ago and meant nothing to me and probably not to her other than she was excited about it.

3) Is it really necessary to have big discussions about the kids on a routine basis? I would think for important issues that it's necessary, but setting aside time to meet seems unnecessary. Can't these things be addressed as they arise (which can't be that often). I wonder if maybe you want that time with your XW and it's more about you than the kids. I could see why your gf has a problem with always "keeping in touch". Your XW may be uncomfortable with meeting for these talks because she thinks you are hung up on her still, and maybe you are...in fact, since you're posting, you probably are. So why wouldn't that make her uncomfortable. She can't have these discussions with you because she might be leading you on.

Those are just my thoughts.