Its too bad your H handles the children in that manor...unfortunately it sounds like he had a poor role model. He probably has a notion thats how fatherhood should be.
I really hope he wakes up for the kids sake. I can see why you are ready to wash your hands of the whole mess.
Me: 30 EX-H: 37 DD: 5 Separated 6/07. MC for months, EX-H quit MC. Divorce Final 8/14/08. Trying to move on with new life.