Cobra, just curious ... why would you continue to choose to adhere to a standard you can't defend?
Who said I’m defending it? I’m throwing it out there, saying it is a double standard, men use it, women don’t like it, but that’s life.
Mojo,
I know you think you “accidentally” triggered sex with NG, but come on, is that REALLY true? Didn’t you converse with him for some time on your internet dating service, and didn’t you reveal there your sexual preferences? Didn’t you make it clear that you are looking for no-strings attached sex, that you are sexually adventurous and assertive? NG didn’t have to get any vibes from you on your date, you had already spelled it out in black and white. You were a top prospect, you had been pre-approved, all he had to do was close the deal. The only uncertainty in his mind was whether you were honest in what you had said on-line.
If he had just met you in a coffee shop, and did not have the benefit of your email exchanges, I bet he would have treated you completely differently on your first date. He would have had that little voice in his head telling him that if he pushes too hard, he might get slapped and told to back off. I do believe you said he is intelligent, educated, well groomed? So he knows the ground rules. On your date, you had explicitly thrown out those rules, so he was free to “paw” you.
Again, that is fine, if that’s what you want. I also agree that is something you need right now. Nothing wrong with that. But it won’t get you what you really want.
As for me and my count, well that was an interesting exercise… had to think way back… not sure if I got them all but I am topping you, including one-night stands. I appreciate that you don’t judge men on their number of sexual encounters. But I know that. So do other men. That’s part of the double standard.
Regarding my mama, well she never said anything to me about promiscuous women, but it was as much understood from her as it was from my friends, male AND female. As Corri says – slumming.
Do you really think that most women tell their sons to avoid certain women or something like that?
You better believe it!
I wonder what she was really trying to accomplish by communicating that to you?
Hmmm… let’s see….don’t bring home a slut, maybe???
I can't even imagine the bad vibe I would get off of you if I might the mistake of being sexual with you.
You’re right. If I thought you were a slut, you’d be getting the vibe that I thought you were slutty. I would be judging you. Double standard.
