[..]I would simply point out that I fully understand that Cobra doesn't respect women who are highly sexual in their behavior and I'm equally certain that MrsCobra fully understands this fact about him too. The mating dance and all its intricacies doesn't stop at the altar. If I was married to Cobra and I wanted respect from him more than anything else I would behave like MrsCobra.
Me, I would throw dishes. Which would mean there'd be no plates in the house a week after we got married, and one or both of us would throw up our hands and file for divorce in disgust.
Corri weirded me out a while back because she posted something to the effect of "You are so far beyond being the kind of woman who has sex to "get" men".
I wanna know the context for that Corri quote. Especially if it weired you out.
However, the thing that is true if you are a reasonably attractive, HD woman in touch with her sexuality and not currently suffering from low self-esteem is not that you WILL have sex with anyone because you're desperate for sex but rather that you CAN have sex with just about anyone so you will usually choose or signal to the best man available or the one on whom you have a bit of a crush. So, if it ever again happens to you that a woman behaves like that in your presence you should take it as a compliment because it probably means that she likes you and/or thinks that you're sexy, maybe so much that she doesn't bother to worry about whether you'll respect her in the morning.
I've had guys approach me in that manner. I wouldn't go near one with a ten-foot pole. I don't take it as a compliment, and he devalues himself to me if he approaches me in such a way.
I don't know what it is like to be on the receiving end of that as a guy.
Very interesting article Corri. I agree with a lot of it. From my perspective I feel I am very successful and respected in my profession but a little voice inside of me says I've got to keep all the plates spinning or else it will all crash down on me. Consequently I take on more and more until I either emerge the hero because I do what others cannot, or the goat because I run out of bandwidth.
Gone the carvings and those who left their mark. Gone the kings and queens, now only the rats hold sway.
You women are toooo funny!! Talk about stirring up a hornet’s nest… it’s always interesting to me how women will say they are independent thinkers and doers, don’t need a man telling them what to think, how to act, etc. and yet when I put up one judgmental male POV, look at the responses!
If you all will read a little closer into what I was saying you will see that I am not judging Mojo at all. If she wants to hump the whole army that’s fine with me. What I was saying is that if she is concerned with her self image, and because IMO she gets some of that image from her interaction with men, then she might think about how men feel regarding women who sleep around.
NG may want to be with Mojo, even if he knows all her sexual past. But throw in an extra 20 or 30 studs and he might feel differently. I’m pretty sure his mama will feel differently too. And before everyone jumps on that statement, take a reality check and know that no matter how much a man thinks he is independent of his mother, her voice about these types of morality issues, still plays in his head. Doesn’t matter what you think of that, that’s just the way it is. Furthermore, if he doesn’t hear it from his mother’s voice, he will hear it from his male friends.
What I was pointing out to Mojo is the double standard that men use to judge women. I’m not defending it, saying it is right or wrong, but that’s the way it is, and I adhere to it too. Now if Mojo doesn’t give a rat’s ass what I think, there’s no problem, is there?
I've had guys approach me in that manner. I wouldn't go near one with a ten-foot pole. I don't take it as a compliment, and he devalues himself to me if he approaches me in such a way.
I don't know what it is like to be on the receiving end of that as a guy
Sometimes I post things and when I go back and read them I realize that I probably come off as somebody who is really a lot more blatantly sexually assertive than I am in real life. I think there are probably a lot of LD women who actually act more sexually assertive in public than me for social reasons. I was assuming in the example Cobra gave, he had made some sort of sexual approach or blatant signal to the woman and she was simply responding in a freely, highly aroused sexual way and not waiting for him to up the ante. I wasn't imagining some woman hitting on Cobra by squirming all over him on a bar stool or something like that - lol.
For instance, I did accidentally verbally sort of maybe initiate sex with NG on our first date but only after he was pretty seriously flirting with me for most of the evening, had extended our date to multiple venues, had taken many opportunities to touch me and had invited me to spend the night at his house so I wouldn't have to drive home so late/far. The more that I think about it, the more that I tend to think that my behavior errs on the side of dorky space cadet than slut. Okay, you guys are going to be laughing at me (put down beverages-fair warning)but I will tell you what happened. As I indicated above, the man was pretty seriously flirting with me all evening (smelling my perfume etc.) then he invited me to spend the night at his house. Okay, at this point of the story I will admit that women less inclined to act like monkey-girls might have made a different decision but I go back to his house and he is acting like he really did just ask me to spend the night to be nice. Like I'm going to be his little house guest. So, I'm sitting there on his sofa wearing the giant man robe he lent me while he's off making up a spare bed for me and I'm kind of groggy cause it's way past my bedtime and I'm just sort of bemused/curious not really actively horny or discontented but when he comes back in the room I just smiled and asked him "Don't you want to make out or something?" and I don't care if you guys don't wish to believe me but in my mind I really was just asking him if he WANTED to make out not actually inviting him to make out with me. I'm still in this kind of trance where I believe that all men are LD in relation to me but that's okay as long as they are nice. Okay then there was a boring part I'll skip. Then he put his hand on me and the way he did it I knew right away for sure that he was one of my kind and my arousal shot through the roof and then he knew too ( I'm quite certain he had some serious doubts before this point-lol) and as I've previously indicated the sex was just out of this world out of control super-freakin' fantastic.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
NG may want to be with Mojo, even if he knows all her sexual past. But throw in an extra 20 or 30 studs and he might feel differently.
Cobra,
How many women have you slept with? Be aware I'm not judging your stud capacity or anything like that. I would thoroughly respect you if you decided to enter a monastery tomorrow but be aware that sexually confident high drive women when they talk amongst themselves do tend to judge men on their sexual experience and capabilities. Therefore, it would probably be best if you did stick to women who have slept with fewer men than me (13 FYI). I intend to stick to men who have slept with way, way more women than that. Of course, you are right to suggest that a man like that would likely cheat on me in a committed LTR, just like NOP cheats all the time and I'm sure BF will cheat on his next wife and all the other men on this BB who have slept with let's say more than 50 women will likely cheat a lot too. This weekend I'm probably going to go out with a seemingly very nice, very intelligent 52 year old man who is 6'5", 230 lbs. does 500 sit-ups and push-ups a day and has been a working musician since his teens.How many women do you think he has slept with? Do you think he would be afraid to take a sweet, harmless, little book dealer like me home to meet his quite possibly dead mother? He indicated that he is looking for a LTR. Do you think he is lying? I'm not going to sleep with him right away because my current POV is that it would be, to use a phrase from my youth, bogue to have sex with a man who is looking for a LTR before I figure out if I might possibly want one with him and the dopamine/oxytocin will cloud my judgment.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
Okay, that was rude monkey of me to imply that sexual experience is the issue. There are plenty of guys who lack sexual experience who are good men. Lou, for example. Your problem Cobra is that your Mama taught you how to be a nice boy but didn't let you become a good man. Lou, obviously, had a bit of the opposite problem.(Get in touch with that monkey, Lou!) Do you really think that most women tell their sons to avoid certain women or something like that? I wonder what she was really trying to accomplish by communicating that to you? Anyway, you are proving yourself to be exactly the kind of guy I was thinking of when I flamed out at BF a bit when he suggested that I might want to find somebody who wasn't a wolf. I can't even imagine the bad vibe I would get off of you if I might the mistake of being sexual with you.
Anyway, I do apologize for being rude in the last post. The thing is my monkey is currently riding on the shoulder of a good guy who is 6'5" and was raised in Detroit but I shouldn't take advantage of the situation to stick my tongue out at you. However, if I were you, I might think twice about approaching a guy like that if he is dating me and whispering in his ear that your Mama thinks girls like me are slutty.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
