Thank you for the concern. You know someone asked me why did it take 2 1/2 years to make the decision and the answer is exactly what you're touching on. I was on meds, my emotions were completely out of control and I knew better than to make a life changing decision like this when my emotions were running wild. It took me this long to get them in check. I'm off the meds and I'm feeling much better.
I don't think Ret is a waste of time, I frankly just don't want to go. Plain and simple. I'm not avoiding or scared of feeling differently, I feel as though I've stayed confused long enough and I don't want anymore junk in my head. This touchy feely stuff is getting on my nerves. It is what it is. My H had a year affair with a 30 year disgusting person, and I can't get over it. There's nothing wrong with this, nor is there anything wrong with me. I'm not going to treated as though I'm the bad-guy. I'm the person who gave up 2 1/2 years of their life to try and salvage a M that someone thought so little of. That's how I feel and I'm fine with the decision. I'm not emotional about it at all.
