I received information from Retrouville and read it thoroughly. I've decided it's not for me but I thank you for the suggestion. I've been really evaluating my sitch and praying, etc. I've asked my H for a divorce. I believe this is the best thing for me and him. As you all have said here, if I can't let it go and if there isn't anything he can do, let him go. I've decided that is the only fair thing to do and for my own sanity, I think that's what needs to be done for me. We've talked about this and have decided that we will do this amicably and try to keep our friendship in tact. We're both sad, but my H understands and as a matter of fact he told me he knew where I was. I was to the point of "I don't care what he does" and there is some truth in that. He said he knew this from his own experience in his first M.
I will moving to yet another forum, separated, divorced, or whatever the name of the forum is that will best fit my sitch.
Thank you all for listening and sharing your wisdom.
