MC - nervous and need advice

[still hoping]

I was alone so much of the time that in some ways, H leaving didn't make that much of a difference in my life.

Same here. Ran in to a friend the other day who said "it must be hard taking care of the 2 kids by yourself" and I thought to myself "actually, it's no different than when H was around..."

You and I are in the same place about really wondering if we want H back. Thanks for your post a while back with all the questions. Made me realize a lot of things...